Thesis: Does the Perfect man exist?

Ok yes I get it guys, I am a 36 year old Married Woman discussing this (omg I’m 37! 37 I say!!. My head hurts. Too close to 40). I was thinking what to write about, their is so much at the moment really, but I just wanted something a little light hearted and fun, and what can be more fun than discussing men?? (Muhahahahaha *witches laugh*)

So I’m going to look at this like a school project, and the Thesis is “Does the Perfect Man exist?”

Methodology (Don’t have a go at me, I’m really getting into this!)

For my investigation I used my Instagram followers and we discussed what makes a perfect man, and I also used media channels like television programmes, novels and netflix…

(Gosh it really is starting to sound like a school project…)

On Instagram I asked my followers “what makes a perfect man?” And the responses I got varied: here’s a few of them , and generally all of them were around the same sort of ideals

The pages do go on, but the general consensus being, respectable honest, a great cook, understanding, loyalty, supporting, you know that kind of thing….surprises you, dotes on you, gives you his heart, his t-shirt, his credit card, his soul…. ( Ok, ok maybe not the soul, but the rest will do)…

For my first case study I will be using Joe From YOU

Joe From 'You' Just Got Creepier—Netflix Releases Video Without ...

Stalker, Pervert, Murderer, Sociopath, Abusive, Self obsesessed just a few of his stronger personality traits here (*rolls eyes*)…… and yet I would date him in a second…. Did I just say that aloud? Yes I did! I did, and its ok to say it out aloud girls…. because you would too! (don’t lie)

I mean if we put all of this aside (I cant believe I am saying this!) he is a great guy- the best guy, evan Perfect…..he is sensitive, he remembers birthday, anniversaries, he knows your likes, dislikes, cooks, cleans, he gets to know your friends, ( he ticks all the above instagram responses) and…….. he even kills the people you dont like. (How can you not love him?!!) Just minus the murdering part and the glass box…. and we found him. The perfect candidate. The Perfect Man…….(kinda)

Case Study 2: Christian Gray, 50 Shades

Christian Grey's Background in Fifty Shades of Grey | POPSUGAR ...

I am definately more of a Joe fan, than a Christian Gray. Actually I DEPISE Christain Grey……. but I know how populer he is with the ladies. So why is he considered ‘perfect?’…. Once again he is sensitive, emotional, rugged, assertive, confidence overload, dominant….Rich! Rich I Say and that gives him Power.. Who buys thier girlfriend a brand spanking new Audi on the first date?…. Urm Christian Grey does….(Bonus!)

So once again we have the perfect candidate, we just have to put aside the fact that he is a stalker, pervert with psychological issues with make him controlling and manipulative, and dominant….. That’s all….. Simples. ( I’m going to move quickly along to our next perfect man, because I have issues with this novel. Big issues! )

Case Study 3: Peaky Blinders- Tommy Selby

6 reasons why Cillian Murphy would make an incredible James Bond

By order of the Peaky Blinders…. (hehe- had to be done)…..I nominate Tommy Selby for our third case….. We women are always looking for the perfect man, and yet we Think Tommy Selby is one?…. urm, lets put aside the whole drug, murdering, taking peoples eyes out with the razor thing, im sure we can let the ‘little’ details ‘slide’ right?. He is a solid family man, with family values, looks after the family, hes strong, powerful, definately loyal when in love, and ….urm…. just dont mess with the family, or the business…and there you go ….. The perfect man.

The world is full of ‘Perfect’ Men. We just have to find them (and not think of the bad stuff)

I think that’s enough case studies for today? You guys are getting my gist right.


Now lets look at this more clearly, and a little less of the humour side of things.

As women we are subjected to these images of men. I know loving Joe is wrong, but the whole screenplay make me sympathise with him, I actually laugh at his ‘crazy’, I emphatised when he kills people, because ‘bless him’ what could he do?! (OMG. I said that!)…… Tell me how lame do I sound!!! I feel lame writing it, but yet I feel that way and that needs expressing. The fact that the director allows us to see Joe’s thought processing is the reason we feel this way…… but why oh why? Its still Wrong!

I used Christian Gray by purpose- I would generally like to think that someone of my age can see right through Christian Gray and all the ‘wrongs’ in that relaitionship- however I do know that teenagers are obsessed with him and some women even older, and the whole- its not porn because its a book logic (fails me *rolls eyes*)but we are subjected to these kind of men in books, in our screen, in everything, men that need loving, the characters play on the womens natural habitat of caring and mothering and trying to fix a lost soul…….and these characters are being romantised….. so instead of running a mile, we stay and put up. Endings in books are always great, in reality its a longer struggle and hurdle, some more so than others.

The reality is, although we are subjected to this every living day of our lives, would we really read books that were simple and straightforward? Watch programmes where a man and women fall in love and stay together… forever….No. So although I am complaining that we are subjected to this, I also want a ‘little‘ bit of Joe and Tommy Selby in my life, just a little, a minute amount, maybe you know have CBD as medicinal rather than as a addiction kinda little, you know the little gangsta in us (to help aid our tired arms and legs).

Movies, Books play on what the readers want, what sells, and it seems Christian Gray, Joe and Tommy Selby are hot on the market, all for the wrong reasons…. but its working


So in reality its time to stop looking for the perfect man, and just deal with the one sitting on the couch scratching his underarms. I mean he could have been a psycho over dominant murdering drug lord, but instead he has a day job, and remembers to bring the milk home (when you ask). How lovely. What more could you want? (** dont answer that!)

Love and Regards


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7 thoughts on “Thesis: Does the Perfect man exist?”

  1. I really enjoyed this! First post of yours in reading and I’m subbing right away 😊I promise it’s not because you picked such scarily attractive men!


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