The Virus that made the World Stand Still

I started off this year with a blog stating that “Be selfish, Be You” and in that blog I stated how 2020 was going to be my year, I was going to make changes, I was going to change the world…… yet the world had different plans.

Today we are at standstill, and all because of a virus?! not just any virus, but a beast of a virus who is threatening humankind, and the worst part is….. nobody knows what to do.

At the begginning of the year we all make so many plans, we sit thinking of what we want to achieve, where we want to travel, what changes we will make to better our lives, we evan contemplated WW3 with the issues between Trump and Iran…… but NEVER did we contemplate this.

Im trying to stay positive, Im trying to keep an open mind, but honestly I feel overwhelmed. Im tired of all the conspiracy theories, I dont care if it was man made, I dont care if china make money from it, or if america make money from it, I dont care if shares are low and we need to buy now to be millionaires later, I dont care if its been introduced to wipe out 1% of the world…… All I care about is thats it here and people are going to die, people possibly around me, people I love, people in my family.

so lets concentrate on that instead.

With Wars in countries, with Brexit, with inflation we have people to blame, we have scapegoats, we have our own theories, our own understandings of the processes involved….. Here mother nature has taken over and God/Allah has shown us his power. We are mere mortal souls, no matter how rich, or how poor, no matter how much money you have, no matter how much power you have, no matter Who you are… we have nowhere to go, we have no where to hide. We are in this together…… and we are terrified.

Can I tell you my biggest fear? My parents. Im sure alot of us feel this way…. its hard knowing that should they be infected, we cannot evan hold their hands at a time like this. We cannot go to see them, they will have to suffer alone. And if worse come to worse (and I really hate thinking of this) that they may go to the grave alone…….That breaks me.

Coming from an indian background/community we are brought up being together at all times, families live together, eat together, laugh together and also cry together. So how will we suffer alone? how will we allow others to suffer alone, how will we get through this?. Our whole ethos will change, our upbringing, our understanding of how to live has all come to a stand still.

And still we are singing ‘Happy Birthday’ whilst washing our hands, (*rolls eye*) I did say that I would only put positive things on the blog, and that is still the case, but I wanted to emphasise that ‘Life seriously is not in our control’, what we think, what we plan can be taken away overnight, as it has right now.

The worst is still to come for us in the UK, with the death toll at 177 today, the schools are now closed, places of social gatherings like bars, clubs, pubs and evan mosques are now closed. Yet our borders are still open, a containment by the people who feel they need it is being performed, yet everyone else walks freely.

This will go down in history as the “Happy Birthday” virus and generations after us will laugh that we thought washing our hands was the answer.

Hope that all of you are keeping well and looking after yourselves.

Love and Regards

M11bna

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New Years Resolution. Be Selfish.

Happy New Year to you All. Another year gone, another year to look forward to.

I’m not really a new year’s resolution person, I make resolutions all year round that I don’t commit to. Why wait for New Year’s?

But this year. I’m going for it. And it’s all about me. This is MY Year to be SELFISH.

I’ve been brought up in a house where we were always told to think of everyone’s else feelings first, to block out our own feelings. And to think before we speak. And this has worked for years on end.

But as you grow older you start to realise that their is only one person who is going to look after YOU, and that is YOURSELF. So you have to make the changes for yourself before its too late.

So this year is the year for me to change. This is MY Year to be SELFISH.

SELFISH: ‘Lacking consideration for other people; concerned chiefly with ones own personal profit or pleasure’

From this interpretation, being ‘Selfish’ is not a likeable trait, so why am i choosing to be ‘Selfish?’

Usually a selfish person is termed so because they refused something that someone else probably would’ve had no objection too. Or they chose to think of themselves before anyone else’s needs……. So really all that person is doing is thinking of themselves, their own well being and their own mental health……. And their is nothing selfish about that.

In order to help and take care of someone else, we first need to be able to take care of our self

Their is a reason why people put others before themselves. They want to please people, they want people to like them. They want to gain something from it all at the expense of loosing themselves. And sometimes when you give too much, people expect too much, and so slowly, slowly every time you put someone else needs before your own, your only teaching them that you come second in your own life.

Eventually this can lead to ‘Resentment’ , and having that trait is far worse than being ‘selfish’. So be a little selfish, and give of what you can. There is nothing wrong with a little bit of self-sacrifice, but its best to know how much you can do and give. a Little ‘NO’ here and there will not damage anyone.

Selfish and Self-Love

There is a difference between self-ish and self-love. The two don’t go together. Is it really more important for people to like you, over your own health and mental well-being? And even if you do choose to be selfish now and then, do you really loose the people that love and care for you? After all they love you for who you are. And if you do loose certain people, we’ll frankly you really didn’t need them in the first place (That sounds so selfish! You go girl! First of January and I have already started my resolution).

For your own Mental health and Well being, you need to be able to attend to your own personal needs. So go and fix yourself first, before you fix anyone else, because in all honesty there are not many who will turn up to fix you when you need them.

So before I go on and on, I will end with “This year is MY Year, it’s about Me”. I’m going to very selfishly and unapologeticaly put my mental health first. And if anyone doesn’t like it….

Well tough luck… I’m selfish deal with it.

Here’s to the New Year.

Love and Regards

M11bna